beauty
love
joy
peace
faithfulness
gentleness
patience
self-control
(1) The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in. His voice dropped to a whisper. "Let it come in. We think we dont deserve love, we think
if we let it in we'll become too soft. But a wise man called Levine said it right. Love is the only rational act. (2) Sometimes, in the mornings, that's when i mourn. I feel around my body,
I move my fingers and my hands--whatever I can still move-- and I mourn for what I've lost. I mourn the slow, insidious way in which I am dying. But then, i stop. I give myself a good cry if
i need it. But then I concentrate on all the good things still in my life. YOU. (3) The culture doesnt encourage us to think about regrets until you're about to die. We're so wrapped up with
egotistical things, career, family, having enough money--trillions of little acts just to keep going. We dont have the habit to stand back and look at our lives "Is this all I want?" You need
someone to probe you in that direction. It doesnt happen automatically. I have found my teacher. Have you found yours? (4) Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live. Listen to that bird
on your shoulder, if you accept that you can die at any time, you might not be as ambitious as you are. (5) Love each other or perish. Family-- nothing else can give you spiritual security. Not
money, not fame. (6) Learn to detach. Dont cling to things, because everything is impermanent. Let the experience penetrate you fully. That's how you are able to leave it. If you dont allow yourself
to go all the way through them, you can never get to being detached. You're too busy being afraid, afraid of pain, grief and vulnerability. Throw yourself into these emotions. Dive in, all the way.
Then, you will know what the emotions are, and detach. (7) You have to find what's good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now. Looking back makes you competitive. And age, is not
competitive. How can I be envious of where you are--when I've been there myself? (8) Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community and people around you, create something
that gives you meaning. Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you wont be dissatified, envious and longing for someone else's things. On the contrary, you'll be overwhelmed
with what comes back. (9) Love is how you stay alive, even after you are gone.Think of my voice and I will be there. (10) Respect, compromise and talk openly. Have a common set of values in life with
your partner. (11) The biggest defect we human beings have is our short-sightedness. Invest in the human family. Invest in those you love and who love you. In the beginning of life, when we were infants,
we need others to survive, right? At the end of life, you need others to survive right? (12) Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Tears are okay. Life is a tension of opposites. (13) As long as we can love
each other, and remember, the feeling of love we had, we can die without ever really going away. Death ends a life, not a rlnship. (14) I love you, Coach. He had finally made me cry.
Above-- excerpts fr Tuesdays with Morrie... (My entries, links and tagboard are in that order -> respectively.)
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Monday, April 03, 2006

to understand brena part1:
i think i have recorded this in one of my super early entries last semester.. i think im one person who has to have alot alot alot of personal space. ever since hurtful things happened to me, i think i have built up an emotional barrier to alot of things around me.. i know of people who tried to break this emotional barrier down by spying on me but of course, it is definitely to no avail. i lost that friendship. that emotional barrier serves as a way to protect myself. porcupine, you call me. yes, i admit. cause i was so badly hurt, i didnt want to go thru it ever ever again. unless you're friends who know me like for ages or people who have been with me since the day i was born, i can not open up to you.. even my mum n my dad.. now, the people i love most in the world.. i think i only opened up to them when i was 18.. so, part 1 of understanding brena.. she needs alot of space. she will respect you for respecting her personal space.. of course, it comes at a price. alot of people wonder how i can shop alone, go Chinatown alone, eat alone, do things alone.. i think it is not being independent but enjoying the peace that comes with it.. that's why i think i am too used to being a single.. very hard for any someone to come near me. as socialite as i can be, i have this side of me that developed since JC. very used to that.
i fell in love with the tiffany ring that you see... it is called the Tiffany&Co. Pear shaped Triple Stone Fancy ring. it is definitely more than 2carat worth.. maybe up to 5k.. i want it. i will buy it for myself.. it is actually an engagement ring.. but i think i can do it without a guy. i will use my first paycheck as a speechie graduate to buy it. i will save up for it. Yanni asked me in lecture today.. if u buy this kind of expensive ring for yourself for leisure, then ur husband how? i told her coyly.. "he will have to buy something equally expensive or more expensive lorz." i think me being materialistic n all, it is just maybe a facade.. cause i know the people i know (guys) will not do such thing.. and i have to build up defence against them.. so, maybe.. ask why i have to build defence against them.. i think it is because.. i have my emotional barrier..
esmee asked me to break it down.. for at least one guy to be allowed in my life.
i think i cant. how? i kinda vowed to her you know..
presently at this moment, graduation as a speechie is what i work for/look towards to. buying the ring and owning my own car that daddy n mummy pay for me for the first instalment will be evidence of me graduating and earning as a speechie.
come to think about it, maybe the reason why the two of us did not have anything worked out cause we were too similar... you wanted to conc on ur studies in Sg, you thought love needed nurture, you thought you had your own personal space..
bree
*brena*; timed 6:07 PM