beauty
love
joy
peace
faithfulness
gentleness
patience
self-control
(1) The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in. His voice dropped to a whisper. "Let it come in. We think we dont deserve love, we think
if we let it in we'll become too soft. But a wise man called Levine said it right. Love is the only rational act. (2) Sometimes, in the mornings, that's when i mourn. I feel around my body,
I move my fingers and my hands--whatever I can still move-- and I mourn for what I've lost. I mourn the slow, insidious way in which I am dying. But then, i stop. I give myself a good cry if
i need it. But then I concentrate on all the good things still in my life. YOU. (3) The culture doesnt encourage us to think about regrets until you're about to die. We're so wrapped up with
egotistical things, career, family, having enough money--trillions of little acts just to keep going. We dont have the habit to stand back and look at our lives "Is this all I want?" You need
someone to probe you in that direction. It doesnt happen automatically. I have found my teacher. Have you found yours? (4) Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live. Listen to that bird
on your shoulder, if you accept that you can die at any time, you might not be as ambitious as you are. (5) Love each other or perish. Family-- nothing else can give you spiritual security. Not
money, not fame. (6) Learn to detach. Dont cling to things, because everything is impermanent. Let the experience penetrate you fully. That's how you are able to leave it. If you dont allow yourself
to go all the way through them, you can never get to being detached. You're too busy being afraid, afraid of pain, grief and vulnerability. Throw yourself into these emotions. Dive in, all the way.
Then, you will know what the emotions are, and detach. (7) You have to find what's good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now. Looking back makes you competitive. And age, is not
competitive. How can I be envious of where you are--when I've been there myself? (8) Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community and people around you, create something
that gives you meaning. Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you wont be dissatified, envious and longing for someone else's things. On the contrary, you'll be overwhelmed
with what comes back. (9) Love is how you stay alive, even after you are gone.Think of my voice and I will be there. (10) Respect, compromise and talk openly. Have a common set of values in life with
your partner. (11) The biggest defect we human beings have is our short-sightedness. Invest in the human family. Invest in those you love and who love you. In the beginning of life, when we were infants,
we need others to survive, right? At the end of life, you need others to survive right? (12) Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Tears are okay. Life is a tension of opposites. (13) As long as we can love
each other, and remember, the feeling of love we had, we can die without ever really going away. Death ends a life, not a rlnship. (14) I love you, Coach. He had finally made me cry.
Above-- excerpts fr Tuesdays with Morrie... (My entries, links and tagboard are in that order -> respectively.)
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Friday, November 04, 2005
10 things women want man to know:
1. We do not need to hear you say, "I'll call you," if you don't plan to, says Leora, a single New Yorker. Bottom line, most women would rather be let down than lied to. Though to be fair, women white-lie the same way, saying "Let's have lunch!" to acquaintances we know we won't make time for. That's because "I'll call you" and its cousins serve as WD-40 for that awkward goodbye. So the trick, gentlemen, is to come up with an alternate graceful out, such as, "Thanks for a really nice evening." Yes, even if that's a lie. (Bonus tip: If you are going to call, "Waiting three days does not make us like you better," says Cara, a single Manhattanite.)
2. If you're busy, we prefer getting a quick e-mail saying so rather than being left to wonder why you've dropped off the face of the earth, says Beth, a single woman currently studying in France. If you're slammed at work this week and can't give us the attention you'd like to, we'll live -- all we want is a heads-up. We don't need to talk all the time; a brief call or e-mail saying you'll check in next week is not rude, it's thoughtful. (As long as you actually do it.)
3. Even if you're not a world champion plan-maker, every effort is appreciated -- we don't want to feel like the social secretary of the relationship, says Eve, an attached New Yorker. Yes, we like some control in this area, but we're also...tired. Which means that, as generous as it sounds, hearing "Whatever you want to do!" rarely turns us on. But really, no pressure: Generally, we prefer fun to fancy.
4. You shouldn't be offended if weI don't jump right in with both feet, says Gail, a single woman in New Jersey. "Some women just need more time than others." Relax -- we need time and space, too. If we're hanging back, it doesn't mean we're testing you or playing games, or that we don't like you. We might just need a chance to figure out how we feel as things run their course. (Or we might just be slammed at work. Sound familiar?)
5. When we're mad at you, don't try to hug and kiss us. We want to punch you, says Kris, an Austin, Texas, single. Men have been raised to fear the stereotypical Angry Woman. But trying to plaster over our rage with smooches will only make actual steam come out our ears. Letting us be mad -- even fighting back -- is actually the best way to calm things down.
6. Engaging you in a lively debate doesn't mean we're trying to change your mind...except when it does, says Shana, a mom in Queens, New York. Seriously, we like a good argument. The friendly fights over world issues between a die-hard conservative and a liberal mate can be some of the best -- that is, most passionate -- moments.
7. We want to know enough about your ex to know that she's not a threat, says Karen, a single woman in Washington DC. "If you never say word one, I'll worry that things are still raw -- but I don't want all the gooey details either." In other words, we want the Cliffs Notes version of your breakup, plus one damning detail that will make us feel secretly superior.
8. Don't go for the obvious spots on the body; take a trip around them and see what happens, says Mary, a single woman in Manhattan. We like the obvious zones as much as the next girl, but exploring a woman everywhere shows that (a) you know that all women are different, (b) you want to get to know every inch of her, and (c) you want to know what makes her, in particular, say, "Oooh!"
9. Taking care of something that's been hanging over our heads and making us miserable is worth 10 orgasms, says Susan, a mom in Newton, Massachusetts. One woman knew that the guy she was dating was a keeper when he surprised her by flattening and recycling all the empty boxes that were driving her nuts.
10. We actually do want to know if something makes us look fat. Just maybe not in so many words. Saying, "That's fine, but I think you look really great in the green dress," gets you major, major points. Not that we're counting.
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anatomy drives me mad. it makes me so much less a human cause i've turned into a shouting and rude beast and maniac online. :( i am currently in the mode of leave-me-alone.. like really alone.. even conversations with pk n jason are now having fullstop malfunctions.. ie, i have alot alot of "......." cause simply i either have nothing to say or i jus refuse to pick up a fight with them. cause i know it will escalate to worse stages.
sigh.
*brena*; timed 3:26 PM