beauty
love
joy
peace
faithfulness
gentleness
patience
self-control
(1) The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and to let it come in. His voice dropped to a whisper. "Let it come in. We think we dont deserve love, we think
if we let it in we'll become too soft. But a wise man called Levine said it right. Love is the only rational act. (2) Sometimes, in the mornings, that's when i mourn. I feel around my body,
I move my fingers and my hands--whatever I can still move-- and I mourn for what I've lost. I mourn the slow, insidious way in which I am dying. But then, i stop. I give myself a good cry if
i need it. But then I concentrate on all the good things still in my life. YOU. (3) The culture doesnt encourage us to think about regrets until you're about to die. We're so wrapped up with
egotistical things, career, family, having enough money--trillions of little acts just to keep going. We dont have the habit to stand back and look at our lives "Is this all I want?" You need
someone to probe you in that direction. It doesnt happen automatically. I have found my teacher. Have you found yours? (4) Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live. Listen to that bird
on your shoulder, if you accept that you can die at any time, you might not be as ambitious as you are. (5) Love each other or perish. Family-- nothing else can give you spiritual security. Not
money, not fame. (6) Learn to detach. Dont cling to things, because everything is impermanent. Let the experience penetrate you fully. That's how you are able to leave it. If you dont allow yourself
to go all the way through them, you can never get to being detached. You're too busy being afraid, afraid of pain, grief and vulnerability. Throw yourself into these emotions. Dive in, all the way.
Then, you will know what the emotions are, and detach. (7) You have to find what's good and true and beautiful in your life as it is now. Looking back makes you competitive. And age, is not
competitive. How can I be envious of where you are--when I've been there myself? (8) Devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community and people around you, create something
that gives you meaning. Do the kinds of things that come from the heart. When you do, you wont be dissatified, envious and longing for someone else's things. On the contrary, you'll be overwhelmed
with what comes back. (9) Love is how you stay alive, even after you are gone.Think of my voice and I will be there. (10) Respect, compromise and talk openly. Have a common set of values in life with
your partner. (11) The biggest defect we human beings have is our short-sightedness. Invest in the human family. Invest in those you love and who love you. In the beginning of life, when we were infants,
we need others to survive, right? At the end of life, you need others to survive right? (12) Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Tears are okay. Life is a tension of opposites. (13) As long as we can love
each other, and remember, the feeling of love we had, we can die without ever really going away. Death ends a life, not a rlnship. (14) I love you, Coach. He had finally made me cry.
Above-- excerpts fr Tuesdays with Morrie... (My entries, links and tagboard are in that order -> respectively.)
//-->
Monday, August 29, 2005
enlightened. motivated. striving.
i discovered more about myself today while walking to the gym.. gym is good. and to those pp who think i stopped running since i moved to grace, boohoo. I AM RUNNING.. MORE.
reasons why i will never ever think of giving up my degree..
(1) my parents knew tt i was the most stubborn kid in my whole family. once i set my mind to do sth, i will want to do it. die or not die, i will do it.. like once i want sth, i will get it. (my friend on friendster wrote tt in his testimony for me. brena gets what she wants.).. when they sent me here to Australia, they know that i will stick to my decision of becoming a speechie. its not the $ involved, $ spent can be earned. its the good pt of me being stubborn n sticking to my dreams.. they knew that no matter how hard it will be, i will stick it thru. and i swear..i will not ever give up this dream.
(2) to use $200,000 to buy a degree is tough. to use $200,000 to buy a diamond rice bowl is tough. if that's the price i have to pay for a lifetime of endless job opportunities and to have a career where no matter where i go, i will be wanted. I WILL PAY. 200,000 including the effort, the late nights, the sleepless nights, the anat&ling nightmare. I WILL. nothing in life comes easy. (for those who haven discovered this pt, please never visit my blog again.my blog is not suitable for you.) so, for a lifetime of rosyness ahead after 2008 Dec, i am fighting for my last struggle in life. and for that rosyness, i will fight on.
(3) whether or not i am fated to be a medical doctor or a speechie, i have chosen my path.. as i said, that phrase, I want to help pp... though i know speechie helps limited number of pp (we only help stroke, neuro-damaged, swallowing impairment, speech impairment adults n kids), though i know pp are going to laugh at me when i tell them i look into pp's mouth, teach them how to swallow and talk.. and say "ahh" or "eee" or "ooo", i am not going to bother about them. they know nuts about my profession. jus ask them. what is child syntax.. do they know anyth? NO. ask them, what is a swallow? do they know anything? NO. so, i will never lower myself to bother about such pp who critique about my job, without knowing the sacredness of it.. and one day, they will know.. how sacred and important my job is to pp..
(4) i love my job. since JC, i have been wanting to get a combination of both science and arts subjects.. cause i have been good at languages.. as well as the pure mugging of maths n science.. now that i have gotten it, anat is sci, ling is arts, psyc is both sci n arts.. what am i and who am i to complain? God gave me this chance to study. God gave me this special opportunity to be one of the 90 Speechies in Sg, in time to come. God wants me to be special and help pp in the special way. i am not defying it. I will love my job. if after it, i were to be a medical doctor, i will specialize in the ALS fields in swallowing n speech i was telling you all about.
To summarize, i love my studies. i love my job. though i have heaps n tonnes of assignmts up, i am not bowing down to fatigue. I am fighting. Everyone, fight on. And from today, if anyone were to criticise anything about speech therapy, i will shoot the eyeballs out of them n skin them alive in burning oil. SHUT UP IF YOU DUNNO ANYTHING ABOUT SPEECH. for its only us who knows it. ACT DUMB IF YOU DUNNO. DONT SHOW UR STUPIDITY.
anyway, on a lighter note, King Kee is coming over to Perth!! =) for 9mths of miltary training! :) yey!! a visitor for long!! =) i promised him tt i will be nice to him n will drive away the loneliness for him.. and of course! i will be there for him when he comes over in Oct.. see me n my optus phone working!! :) king kee, if you're reading this, really dun worry too much abt coming australia ok? :) got me.. even when the sky drops, also not scared. :)
cause i was talking to him n kenzy last night.. King kee made me feel so loved by him.. he always does... =) always making me feel super loved.. and he's always so sweeeeeeeeet!! really v sweeeeeeeeeeeet!! kenzy also!! kenzy was like.. when you going back? why you not going back? i was planning to take u girls on a holiday after a yr of studying (me, es, jh).. so sweet right? the best thing is, dont forget got us, ur old friends hor... =) KENZY!! LISTEN UP!! i will never ever forget i have you all as my closest friends.. you guys have surpassed that best friends thingy.. and i will never ever forget you all!! love you all too much!! you all are at the most ultimate level of my heart, other than my family!! its always nice talking to pp like them.. kenzy, king kee, jason.. (esp jason..) haha... :) those are friends i love my entire life.. thanks for being there. i have friends who love me.. those really nice and beautiful and perfect pp.. i cant ask for more.. though in Australia, its hard to find friends like you all who really love me and care for me, i know after my stint here, i will be back home to pp who love me and open their arms unconditionally for me.. and i know, everytime when i am back, i am safe in their arms.. *hugz*****
anyway, i also decided.. from now on, i will be the classic sagi girl.. studies n career is number 1 for me, together w family n friends.. shared champions.. the 4th position will be travelling.. and yes, i will be floating ard n drifting ard.. and i will stick by the notion i have since my ex left me.. I WILL NOT BE ATTACHED.. UNLESS I FEEL LIKE IT.. AS FOR NOW N THE NEAR FUTURE, I WILL SUCCUMB TO THE INNER ME OF BEING CAREFREE.. GUYS ARENT THE PRIORITY RIGHT NOW. FREEDOM IS.
off to bathe.. i jus came back fr gym.. anyway, i will have more ekka photos. watch this space.
-little miss brenny aka miss mercedes benz aka i love my speechie-
*brena*; timed 4:14 PM